Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Did the earth move for you?


I was emailed this, if you know who it belongs to, let me know
Last week there was an earthquake here in Adelaide. It was only a 3 something on the Richter scale, but it was enough of a tremor to make young men feel like studs if they climaxed at the right time. I’m sorry, but I missed it; I climaxed hours before hand and was sound asleep. But how awesome would that have been to reach that moment with my lady, move the Earth, and then give her a wink? It would be a moment you would tell your kids.

Unfortunately, I have managed to miss every earthquake I have been in, except for the first.

I was in Nagoya Japan on a school trip in 2001 sitting in my host mother’s lounge room doing a cultural exchange for a few days, but only succeeding in communicating in the international language of over acting mime. All of a sudden the room, and I assume the whole house, started to shake, and there was a loud roar coming from outside. I assumed it was a low flying plane or something and did not think much about it. The host mum casually reached for the electronic dictionary, and started typing in a word. She found what she was looking for, handed me the dictionary and pointed to a word.

“HOLY SHIT, IT’S A FUCKING EARTHQUAKE!”

I crawled backwards over the back of the lounge like a crab trying the fish vindaloo for the first time screaming to the door; trying to remember anything about earthquakes survival I had seen in movies. The host mum was laughing her head off – so much for polite society.

When I had calmed down, the host Mum reached for her electronic dictionary and typed in a phrase. "Did the earth move for you?" she asked and had another giggle.

On the news later in the evening, I had no idea what they were saying, but they had a chart over the map of Japan showing the earthquake being 4 point something on the crap-your-dacks scale. I would have sworn that the aftershocks in my pants were higher.

The Japanese earthquake and tsunami earlier this year was a tragedy, and certainly not funny, but I would love to think that there is someone out there, out on the fringes of the earthquake, who timed their release at the precise moment the Earth did. He would be a hero.

Have you ever reached orgasm during an earthquake? If not, do you have a favourite earthquake moment?

1 comment:

  1. Your reaction was priceless in Japan. At least it wasn't Godzilla.

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